Trust and Patience
by AyLee Cambell
Summary: Sam's thoughts on Andy, Callahan, and what happened. Pretty much his thoughts during the episode Honor Roll.


Trust and Patience

By AyLee Cambell

Disclaimer: I don't own this show, I don't make any money from writing this. Please don't sue.

Slight spoilers for Hot and Bothered, and more then just slight for Honor Roll. In fact it probably wont make sense to you if you haven't seen Honor Roll.

AN - I love this show so much! It may be new but it's already one of my favorites. I'm supposed to be working on other things right now, and I could be writing so many other things but this popped out. I spent 20 minutes on it so I can't promise that it's good, but I didn't just want to leave it on my computer when I could post it and hopefully have someone enjoy it. So let me know what you think.

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He doesn't know why he didn't get it until it was too late. Sure he had known that Andy trusted him. She never failed to walk beside him when they were both doing their job, she always took his advice and believed him when he told her something.

He doesn't know why it took him to see that she trusted him when they were out of uniform too. The girl with the trust issues, the commitment issues, the girl who didn't want to depend on anyone for fear of getting hurt, she trusted him.

She came to him when she was at her most vulnerable. Sure she reacted physically, but that was almost textbook for that kind of situation. Once in a while you just wanted to shut your brain off and stop thinking. He was the one who should have been able to think clearly, to know that having sex with Andy right after she killed someone for the first time, while she still had a boyfriend, might not be the best time if he wanted any kind of relationship with her in the future.

Which was why he wasn't mad when she stopped. When the lights came back on and her brain kicked in and started thinking again it had forced him to start thinking again. He'd left the room for a moment to get his bearings and then came back in to talk to her. To let her know that he wasn't mad.

He'd only gotten out a few words before she started crying again and instead of talking about them they had talked about the life she took.

She'd gone home in the early morning and he had made it a point to call her multiple times during the week she was out. Stopping by to make sure she was okay and eating right.

So the day that she was supposed to return he was happy to finally have her back. So happy he stopped and got them both a coffee so she wouldn't have to make him a cup. It was his little way of showing her how glad he was that she was back, without him having to say anything. The best thing about him and Andy was how well they understood each other without having to say anything.

But then Noelle said that thing about love and he faltered. He knew he had feelings for his rookie, hell half of the other officers probably suspected as much, but he didn't know if it was love. If it wasn't, it sure as hell could be and that almost scared him. What scared him more was how much he was okay with that thought, how much he wanted that.

Then while he was still on his high, Callahan came to talk to him and ruined it all.

Irritated, hurt, pissed, and jealous he had done something stupid. He had taken some of it out on Andy. Sure he wasn't happy that she was doing anything with Callahan, picking Callahan over him, but he hadn't gone into the situation blind. He had known she was dating the smug asshole with the fake charm. It shouldn't have been such a punch to the gut to hear Callahan talk about it.

He just thought that she would have realized that Callahan wasn't the guy for her, that's all.

Then the retraining exercise came and as soon as he saw the blonde asshole he couldn't help but open his mouth and issue the challenge to the whole detective squad in the hopes that he'd be able to take Callahan on and wipe the smug 'I got the girl' look off his face.

He would have rather wiped it off by actually taking the girl from Callahan, but physical violence was a good second if he couldn't have the first.

All throughout the day he ignored or blew Andy off as much as possible, blaming her for his feelings. It wasn't until later on when they were standing in the office talking to Best when it hit him.

Andy trusted him. Really trusted him. Not just as a rookie trusting her training officer to know what's best, but she personally trusted him. As a person, not just as a cop. She had come to him, regularly came to him whenever she needed help.

Andy, who didn't like trusting people. Who didn't like depending on anyone but herself, who was just learning how to lean on other people and know that they have your back.

She trusted him.

But he had blown it.

He had rushed into things, wanted everything that moment. He had expected her to just dump Callahan and run to him. He had expected everything to be so easy once he admitted his feelings to himself. He expected that she would just automatically know and jump at him.

He should have known better. The most important thing he learned when undercover was that you couldn't rush it. You had to be patient. You rush it and it's all over, and you'll never get it back. One moment could ruin everything.

It was the golden rule, and normally he was known for his patience.

So why had he felt the need to rush this? He should have known better. Andy would realize, and probably pretty soon, that Callahan wasn't the one for her. But all he had done today was to make her cling a little tighter to him, to the safe - and boring - option, rather then make her see the truth he knew she was already starting to see. If she hadn't started to realize the truth, she never would have come to him for help multiple times if Callahan was all that she needed, or if she really trusted or loved him.

So why couldn't he wait until the time was right. It was painful to think of Andy with someone else, especially having to see it right in front of him. But he knew it wouldn't last. Callahan would put his job in front of Andy over and over again and his charm would only get him so far before she wised up and dumped him. It wouldn't be easy to watch but while it was happening he'd be there for her, being patient and waiting for the perfect moment.

Nothing worth having came easy. It was time he started working for what he really wanted.

He wanted Andy, and he was going to get her. She wouldn't stand a chance. He had done undercover a few times, he was good at it.

But now he would have to fix the damage he had done today. She had trusted him, and he had shown her that if his feelings or pride were injured he wouldn't help her. He had unwittingly showed her that he wouldn't be there if she needed him, and he had to fix that fast. Andy would never have a real relationship, would really relax around him again if she didn't trust him and he didn't want to go back to how they were when they first met. When he was so mad and her and she was so defensive around him.

He wanted to be under her guards, not one more reason for them.

At the bar when he made his first attempts at apologizing and fixing things he realized how much damage he had done.

As he watched her and Callahan walk out of the bar together. He recalled exactly how it felt to hit the detective as he called for another drink. He would start getting back into her good graces tomorrow, there was nothing else he could do tonight but get drunk and forget the fact that it wasn't his arms she was in.

But someday really soon she was going to be. He was going to make sure of it.

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